You may think that there is nothing you can do while your loved one is here. But, there is a lot you can do. We know that your loved one belongs to you - not to us.

Please bring us any papers like an Advanced Healthcare Directive, Living Will or list of current medicine you loved one takes.

Each time you visit, check in with your nurse when you arrive. We will tell you how the patient is doing, and how long you should stay. Ask them what you can do. Sometimes music, get well cards, and family photos are comforting. Or, just a quiet visit and lots of rest.

Choose one family member to be a link between the family and the MGH staff. This saves time for the nurses, and helps protect the patient's privacy.

If you think you will get a lot of calls at home asking about your loved one, leave a message on your answering machine that tells everyone how the patient is doing. Tell everyone on the message that you probably won't call back. You can change the message every day and only call back people you want.

Short visits are usually better than long visits - patients needs rest and sleep. Sitting quietly in the room is a good thing to do. Your nurse can usually lower the side rail.

Remind your loved one what day it is and why they are here. (Sometimes, patients get confused, forgetful, excited, or angry. This is often due to the illness, being in a different place, or the drugs they are taking.)

Check with the nurse before giving your loved one any food or drink - including water. Even though they are hungry or thirsty, this may be the wrong thing to do.

Valuables or drugs the patient may have brought with them should be taken home.

And, there are a few things you shouldn't do:
Don't wear perfume or cologne - sick people are often sensitive to smells
Don't bring flowers - they carry bacteria

Don't use a cell phone or computer - they can interfere with the equipment use to monitor your loved one

And, last but not least - if you have questions or concerns, ask us!